Kimmie climbs the walls

Hiya Friday peops

At last a little bit of summer has arrived, and the sunshine has diluted some of the poohy news – shootings, ASBO, etc etc – just gives you a bit of a lift doesn’t it?

Bit of irony this week - while doing one of my regular ‘Risk Awareness’ training sessions, the staff appeared momentarily distracted…… (at least they were still awake I mused….) as they stared out of the windows – alerted by screeching brakes – to see our huge oxyacetylene cylinders being delivered – with the keen delivery guy racing them across 3 lanes of traffic……..it was like I’d arranged a live video clip of the everyday risks our gang like to take at work!!??

I’ll keep this brief again as I have very little feeling in my fingers after climbing at the indoor Creation Climbing Centre in Moseley last night – my arms have been like two lead weights today – can’t lift my arms much – and it’s quite amazing how many times you need to do that every day (if any of you are bored – try and keep a tally…), open doors, reach for chocolate, grip anything without jiddering like Mrs Overall………and typing on a keyboard… the wee girl staff member who was looking after us had to tie a sandbag to herself cos she was dealing with so may lumps of lard slithering up the wall – she was at risk of ejecting through the roof if any of us had suddenly slipped!

Mind you – nice SPICE crowd and a real good laugh – they wouldn’t let me come down – which I suppose I could use as a life metaphor for this week ;-)

Shall be sunning myself in Monmouth tomorrow on a nice little bimble…..hope yours is a good un’.

Kimmie x

WHY CLIMBING IS BETTER THAN SEX (a man's perspective):
1. When you climb, you only have to get yourself to the peak.
2. If you climb with someone other than your regular partner, no one gets mad, in fact, you can all three climb together and share protection!
3. You can reuse your protection, and someone else even cleans it for you, provided you don't put it in too deep.
4. There IS such a thing as being too overhung.
5. You can get belayed without first bekissing.
6. A good hand jam can be as satisfying as any other kind of jam.
7. No matter how many times you fall off, you can always climb back on.
8. Having a belay slave is not a criminal offence.
9. The rocks never expect you to call afterward.
10. Dry friction is a positive quality when you're climbing.
11. The rocks don't care if you show up late.
12. The rocks don't complain after 7 or 8 pitches.
13. When you're climbing, a good two-finger jam will support your body weight.
14. Your belayer never hesitates when you yell "TAKE!"
15. When you're climbing, weird body positions are considered "cool".
16. The rocks don't scream for help when you try for the on-sight flash.
17. The rocks don't complain when you don't want to do cracks anymore and want to do some face.
18. A three-finger pocket isn't too big. 19. You don't have to wait an hour after getting pumped-out.

WHY CLIMBING IS BETTER THAN SEX (a woman's perspective):
1) The rock is always hard.
2) Rocks are never busy watching football when you'd rather climb.
3) Rocks don't complain about the kind of protection you want to use.
4) You can go climbing with another woman and nobody will call you names or hassle you.
5) You can use ropes and harnesses and nobody will think you're kinky.
6) You can go climbing any time of the month.
7) It's over when *you* reach the peak.
8) You won't die of embarrassment if your mother finds your rock gear.
9) If it's in too deep, you can yank on a nut.
10) Nobody ever got pregnant rock climbing!
11) If you need something REAL big, you can always put in a Big Bro'!