Yo TGIFers,
Missed me? No?
Ooooooh yeeees you have :-) … so just for you……….. here’s one I prepared earlier cos I’m off out to see KODO tonight – nothing like getting straight back into the social whirl of St. Irchley :-)
I’ve decided not to bore you with all the details of my fabulous, amazing, wonderful month in NZ……………oh OK then….but just an abridged version (for now.. tho’ watch this space.. and my Blog) because there is so much to tell you that I need to wait until me head’s back straight (my mate Jane acknowledged my “head’s like a shed!”) and I can do it justice. That jet lag lark is interesting isn’t it? I was like doubly blonde for 3 days when I got there but thanks to Manda’s mom’s great suggestion of Jet lag pills the return has been better. The 3 weeks of hiking were fab – and the final week with Manda & Rich & the sproglets and their respective moms and dads was equally as wonderful.
It is a smashing place with really smashing people – I still have a big grin on my face – and so many memories…. So where to start?....
Missed me? No?
Ooooooh yeeees you have :-) … so just for you……….. here’s one I prepared earlier cos I’m off out to see KODO tonight – nothing like getting straight back into the social whirl of St. Irchley :-)
I’ve decided not to bore you with all the details of my fabulous, amazing, wonderful month in NZ……………oh OK then….but just an abridged version (for now.. tho’ watch this space.. and my Blog) because there is so much to tell you that I need to wait until me head’s back straight (my mate Jane acknowledged my “head’s like a shed!”) and I can do it justice. That jet lag lark is interesting isn’t it? I was like doubly blonde for 3 days when I got there but thanks to Manda’s mom’s great suggestion of Jet lag pills the return has been better. The 3 weeks of hiking were fab – and the final week with Manda & Rich & the sproglets and their respective moms and dads was equally as wonderful.
It is a smashing place with really smashing people – I still have a big grin on my face – and so many memories…. So where to start?....
The bus gang were a mixed bunch, and helped me reaffirm that I am (for the most part) ‘normal’. There were four ‘couples’ – and with the exception of one fabulous couple from Manchester, the others served to reinforce why singledom is indeed the right path! Two pairs in particular – no names, no pack drill – a Joyce Grenfell/Mrs Bouquet and Victor Meldrew/Drunken (Fast Show) Armchair guy combo act, together with the another pair who were like two ‘Roadrunners’ on speed - provided the ‘normal’ bus gang with some superb free entertainment – what a hoot – meal stops/banal questions – “Does the water in that waterfall come right down from the top?”/the packing and unpacking of the trailer and the moving around the bus – which was ostensibly so we could all get a different view – personally I know it was so we didn’t have to suffer the same drongo for the whole day!….!
It was like a whirling dervish rugby scrum at every stop with them competing to be first to chop/cook/eat/wash dishes/be a general pain! Fortunately I hooked up with some ‘normals’ – John & Irene, and the stars Penny and Terri – two other single ‘girls’ – Penny (left) is in Peru with her man Dante at the mo’ and has a wicked sense of humour – she has posted lots of photos on ‘Facebook’ already – and laid back Terri (from Dorset) (right) entertained us all philosophising and regaling stories of her childhood in her gorgeous Dorset drawl.
It was like a whirling dervish rugby scrum at every stop with them competing to be first to chop/cook/eat/wash dishes/be a general pain! Fortunately I hooked up with some ‘normals’ – John & Irene, and the stars Penny and Terri – two other single ‘girls’ – Penny (left) is in Peru with her man Dante at the mo’ and has a wicked sense of humour – she has posted lots of photos on ‘Facebook’ already – and laid back Terri (from Dorset) (right) entertained us all philosophising and regaling stories of her childhood in her gorgeous Dorset drawl.
North Island – I got sunburnt within an hour of wandering round Auckland after we landed – I kid you not – my little ears were a sorry mess! So a flaky start – actually they flaked for the rest of the month!!, I loved the simple stuff as well on North Island as well as the spectacular – like the ‘weird’ steam spurting up from peoples’ back yards and the pavements as we drove through Rotorua, the thermal areas - there's a picture of some of the bus gang staring into the champagne pool.... I loved the huge tree ferns and podocarp forests, the sweet song from the Tui birds, the vastness and peacefulness of Lake Taupo... mind you that was when the Roadrunners had gone to bed - good grief that was a meal experience and a half!! Our tour guide Cathy was a star!
The Tongariro Alpine crossing from Mangatepopo through to Ketetahi (highest spot 2797m!) – with a 20kg pack on! (Don’t remember that in the trip notes!) I tell you what these Kiwis must be fit buggers 
if they thought this trip was classified as ‘moderate’ !!
if they thought this trip was classified as ‘moderate’ !! 
The Oterere hut we walked to that daywas in an amazing location and I woke up next to a man I didn't know - those huts are amazing - just rows of mattresses - very cosy! I must've made a huge impression with my Birdgets!! The views were specatcular of the Emerald lakes - apparently where Lord of the Rings was filmed... I chomped through two boxes of Ibuprofen and my knees are still complaining! The bonus tho is I lost half a stone!
Then…. flying in a phut phut plane to South Island over Marlborough Sounds was fantastic – a little worrying that the pilot looked 15 - and then when we landed on the 'runway' (mowed lawn) at Picton there 
was our minibus waiting for us with our second tour guide Mark.
was our minibus waiting for us with our second tour guide Mark.
So....the highlights there were kayaking in Abel Tasman National Park - me and Penny paired up - and had a great time - it was so funny listening to the 'couples' arguing over the steering... and then there was Terri - sneaky bugger managed to get one of the Kiwis to do her steering - mind you me and Penny were laughing cos he was sat in the back in repose while Terri was doing all the rowing oblivious!! She slept well that night - we shared a tent on the beach at Onetahuti beach.... here she is!!
Then there was Milford Sound, hiking up the Buller Gorge – seeing Franz Joseph Glacier, then donning crampons and walking on Fox Glacier – I got a whole bucket load of Fox’s Glacier mints from the Co-Op when I got home – stapled a photo of me on Fox Glacier onto them and gave them out as ‘gifts’ to my nearest and dearest (I’m too generous!) Indeed, as the Maori saying goes..”E iti noa ana, na te aroha.” – which means “Though my present be small, my love goes with it.”. Hiked through a forest of beech trees with the smell of manuka honey in the air from the honeydew which coated the bark – hmmmmmmm ;-?
Another great highlight was when wet boated from Makarora up the Wilkin river, hiked up to Lake Crucible (glacial lake with icebergs) where our intrepid young guide - Mark - dived in
:-O………not that I was looking… but the icebergs chilled him somewhat……and then we hiked back down and next day were choppered out by a rather chunky and hunky pilot – who I noticed hadn’t been diving in any glacial lakes ;-)
Fiordland was beautiful, as was Mount Cook – and we all loved Queenstown – a really chilled place – the steam boat ride across the lake was lovely – with remarkable views of the mountain ranges surrounding them, which remarkably enough were called ‘the Remarkables’ – yes! One scary moment though - as a small group of the ‘normal’ bus gang sauntered alongside Lake Wakitipu soaking up the peaceful charm – a sudden tornado appeared – it was the ‘Roadrunners’ speeding past mumbling something about “getting it all in” – we last saw them as we left the lodge later that evening, heading off for a five course feast to the Gondola restaurant - they were just hobbling back at slightly less than breakneck speed to the lodge looking somewhat pained :-)
I tell you what tho’ – these Kiwis have a funny idea about river crossings – our South Island guide Mark was a tall young thing – so when he gingerly waded across the river, and it went up to just above his knees, I thought… ‘easy peasy’ – however half way across it became apparent that his knees came up to my booby level! Thankfully they acted like a small rubber ring J We had 13 river crossings that day – and ‘Joyce & Victor’ were my crossing buddies – what a pair of plonkers – I should have let go and let them drift off out into the Tasman sea, and done us all a favour ;-)
My last ‘chilled’ week was a whirl too – some nice calm stuff like helping choose door handles for Manda & Rich’s new palace, meeting their pals Lisa & John, neighbour Harold, playing with the sproglets – wobbling 5yr old Lucia’s loose tooth, digging holes in sandpits with 3yr old Sam’s bulldozers, having intelligent conversations with 7 month old Claudia (a refreshing change from some of the bus gang) and then mad stuff too - driving up to Gladstone Downs Station (do a Google for ‘Gladstone Downs’ and read up – Manda’s mom and dad Bev & Allan (TGIFers) are mentioned in the ‘Footsteps of the Rainbow God’) – where I was treated like a Queen! We checked out the mountain irrigation system after driving the truck up the steep mountain tracks, bumped into Manda’s bro’ Jeremy & his wife & babe mustering some sheep, went with Allan to muster some rams with his working dogs – firmly talking to them from the drivers seat of the truck – “Walk up, Come by, Get back…” and then a louder. “GET OUT!!!!” - Gus was a naughty boy – (I liked Gus) when the rams scattered – Allan got them in nicely though.... eventually! (see videos)
Another great highlight was when wet boated from Makarora up the Wilkin river, hiked up to Lake Crucible (glacial lake with icebergs) where our intrepid young guide - Mark - dived in
:-O………not that I was looking… but the icebergs chilled him somewhat……and then we hiked back down and next day were choppered out by a rather chunky and hunky pilot – who I noticed hadn’t been diving in any glacial lakes ;-)
Fiordland was beautiful, as was Mount Cook – and we all loved Queenstown – a really chilled place – the steam boat ride across the lake was lovely – with remarkable views of the mountain ranges surrounding them, which remarkably enough were called ‘the Remarkables’ – yes! One scary moment though - as a small group of the ‘normal’ bus gang sauntered alongside Lake Wakitipu soaking up the peaceful charm – a sudden tornado appeared – it was the ‘Roadrunners’ speeding past mumbling something about “getting it all in” – we last saw them as we left the lodge later that evening, heading off for a five course feast to the Gondola restaurant - they were just hobbling back at slightly less than breakneck speed to the lodge looking somewhat pained :-)
I tell you what tho’ – these Kiwis have a funny idea about river crossings – our South Island guide Mark was a tall young thing – so when he gingerly waded across the river, and it went up to just above his knees, I thought… ‘easy peasy’ – however half way across it became apparent that his knees came up to my booby level! Thankfully they acted like a small rubber ring J We had 13 river crossings that day – and ‘Joyce & Victor’ were my crossing buddies – what a pair of plonkers – I should have let go and let them drift off out into the Tasman sea, and done us all a favour ;-)
My last ‘chilled’ week was a whirl too – some nice calm stuff like helping choose door handles for Manda & Rich’s new palace, meeting their pals Lisa & John, neighbour Harold, playing with the sproglets – wobbling 5yr old Lucia’s loose tooth, digging holes in sandpits with 3yr old Sam’s bulldozers, having intelligent conversations with 7 month old Claudia (a refreshing change from some of the bus gang) and then mad stuff too - driving up to Gladstone Downs Station (do a Google for ‘Gladstone Downs’ and read up – Manda’s mom and dad Bev & Allan (TGIFers) are mentioned in the ‘Footsteps of the Rainbow God’) – where I was treated like a Queen! We checked out the mountain irrigation system after driving the truck up the steep mountain tracks, bumped into Manda’s bro’ Jeremy & his wife & babe mustering some sheep, went with Allan to muster some rams with his working dogs – firmly talking to them from the drivers seat of the truck – “Walk up, Come by, Get back…” and then a louder. “GET OUT!!!!” - Gus was a naughty boy – (I liked Gus) when the rams scattered – Allan got them in nicely though.... eventually! (see videos)
I also went hunting wild boar – I ended up with one between my legs – (dead!) long story…..what a night that was – Rich, Manda’s other bro’ Hugo and two gorgeous Kiwis Hamish and Fraser (the thighs had it) – doing their bestest impressions of ‘Rambo’ – there will be pics (eventually) on the Blog…… then returning home with the smelly bloody boys – they were gutted by the roadside, and then being treated to a feast from Bev – a plateful of scallops, potatoes, garlic bread and salad – and that turned out to be the starters!!! I then had a cow land on my plate – all this and I still lost half a stone!!
Then off to Rich’s parents, Viv & Tony (also TGIFers) – Viv had ceremoniously adorned the front door with a ‘TGI Tuesday – Welcome Kimmie – at long last.” Sign! How fab!! With their house overlooking the rows of vines in the Marlborough vineyards – 200 rows of which are theirs…..Sauvignon Blanc & Chardonnay – I felt like I was in my element – well – the C2H5OH element to be precise :-)…..Tony popped me to see them up close – and will be on the look out for Villa Maria wines now - and then met more family - Rich’s bro Dave & wife and their three sproglets, Penny, Emma & Hamish – nice dinner party that evening – more eating – and meeting more Kiwis. It was an interesting experience too driving to the top of a mountain where there was a (dodgy if you ask me….) airstrip – the Kiwi version of an airstrip is a bit of flat grassy straight – these can be at any angles though - there appear to be no rules about the percentage of incline – suffice to say it would be more like taking off on a ski jump ramp! I also helped crew (well sat there looking pretty really Tony’s yacht in the weekly ‘Tuesday evening’ Marlborough Sound race – we came 4th out of 51 yachts –excellent fun – listening to the four men working together ‘lee ho-ing’ and tacking around the buoys – the relaxing sound of the waves lapping, and the sails flapping interrupted by the very loud horn of the very huuuuuge ‘Cook Strait ferry’ as it ploughed through the middle of the race will also hold a lasting memory!
Suffice to say I blarted like a good un when they put me on the plane from Christchurch to Auckland – knowing that Lucia & Sam would be waving frantically out of the airport bar window – after Manda and Rich had just poured half a bottle of wine down my neck ready for the onward 30hour journey home!
Anyway – I’ll be back there once I’ve won this week’s £95 million Eurolottery.
Got back to work to find they’d decorated my desk with a flock of my very own 6 Merino sheep (bless Clare!), a new ‘sheep’ mug coaster, NZ pics all over my PC screen and desk, a bowl of ‘ocean spray’ pot pourri – a pot of narcissi and a sheep ‘welcome back’ card – bless J
And so, TGIFers – if you’ve got this far – well done – and I’ll leave you with another Maori saying….quite apt for our expanding TGIF crowd – welcome to Kiwis Lisa & John, and Penny & Terri.
“Waiho i te toipoto, kaua i te toiroa” or “Let us keep close together, not wide apart.”
Haera ra….. until next week :-)
Then off to Rich’s parents, Viv & Tony (also TGIFers) – Viv had ceremoniously adorned the front door with a ‘TGI Tuesday – Welcome Kimmie – at long last.” Sign! How fab!! With their house overlooking the rows of vines in the Marlborough vineyards – 200 rows of which are theirs…..Sauvignon Blanc & Chardonnay – I felt like I was in my element – well – the C2H5OH element to be precise :-)…..Tony popped me to see them up close – and will be on the look out for Villa Maria wines now - and then met more family - Rich’s bro Dave & wife and their three sproglets, Penny, Emma & Hamish – nice dinner party that evening – more eating – and meeting more Kiwis. It was an interesting experience too driving to the top of a mountain where there was a (dodgy if you ask me….) airstrip – the Kiwi version of an airstrip is a bit of flat grassy straight – these can be at any angles though - there appear to be no rules about the percentage of incline – suffice to say it would be more like taking off on a ski jump ramp! I also helped crew (well sat there looking pretty really Tony’s yacht in the weekly ‘Tuesday evening’ Marlborough Sound race – we came 4th out of 51 yachts –excellent fun – listening to the four men working together ‘lee ho-ing’ and tacking around the buoys – the relaxing sound of the waves lapping, and the sails flapping interrupted by the very loud horn of the very huuuuuge ‘Cook Strait ferry’ as it ploughed through the middle of the race will also hold a lasting memory!
Suffice to say I blarted like a good un when they put me on the plane from Christchurch to Auckland – knowing that Lucia & Sam would be waving frantically out of the airport bar window – after Manda and Rich had just poured half a bottle of wine down my neck ready for the onward 30hour journey home!
Anyway – I’ll be back there once I’ve won this week’s £95 million Eurolottery.
Got back to work to find they’d decorated my desk with a flock of my very own 6 Merino sheep (bless Clare!), a new ‘sheep’ mug coaster, NZ pics all over my PC screen and desk, a bowl of ‘ocean spray’ pot pourri – a pot of narcissi and a sheep ‘welcome back’ card – bless J
And so, TGIFers – if you’ve got this far – well done – and I’ll leave you with another Maori saying….quite apt for our expanding TGIF crowd – welcome to Kiwis Lisa & John, and Penny & Terri.
“Waiho i te toipoto, kaua i te toiroa” or “Let us keep close together, not wide apart.”
Haera ra….. until next week :-)
